• HEAD: Justicebringer 2000 Specs
    Shoulder: Sanctified Lightsworn Shoulderguards
    SHIRT: Brown Linen Shirt
    CHEST: Merciless Gladiator’s Scaled Chestpiece
    BELT: Girdle of the Endless Pit
    LEGS: Merciless Gladiator’s Lamellar Leggaurds
    BOOTS: Veteran’s Lamellar Greaves
    GLOVES: Gauntlets of Martial Perfection
    CAPE: Recovered Scarlet Onslaught Cape
    WEAPON: Peacekeeper Blade
    SHIELD: Force Reactive Disk
    TABARD: Bilgewater Cartel

  • Hello and welcome! I am, of course, the distinguished and honored Professor Gnomey, an acclaimed expert on truthism and internetology at Gnomeregan Gnuniveristy.  Professor Billy could not be here today due to some… uh… legal troubles.  Something about him forging his credentials or some such.  Anyway, I am here to discuss the fabulous and fantastical Mists of Pandaria beta.  Or namely, to address some HORRIBLE rumors being tossed around the ‘Tweetor’.  You seem, some rascally hooligans thought it would be fun to make up things about the new WoW expansion on the internet.  Thus breaking the delicate and carefully maintained balance of everything on the internet being true.  Which it has. Completely.  I trusted every word I read on there until these trouble makers decided to start flat out LYING to the whole world.  But I one upped them all. I took notes. I wrote them aaaaall down.  And now I’m gonna to expose them for the dirty little liars they all are.  These are just some of the lies I saw perpetrated under the extremely deceptive hashtag of #FakeMoPBetaLeaks!

    @Vrykerion

    • In order to combat perceived Horde bias, Alliance quests will get extra love & have twice as many pop culture references.
    • The Horde wins, all players get free faction transfers, Alliance becomes a neutral faction of NPCs
    • To make Pandaria easier to traverse without flying, a gnomish train system dubbed ‘The Panda Express’ has been added.
    • A level 88 quest hints that the reason we fight Garrosh is he ate Thrall’s cookie that was clearly labeled ‘Do Not Eat’
    • Shaman receive a class quest at level 90 that after mastering all four elements will receive the “Thrall State” stance
    • In a quest to restablish Varian as a good leader, players will be his ‘wingman’ to help him ‘score’ at a Pandaren bar.
    • To correct the ‘indignity’ of some classes wearing “skirts” or “dresses”, now all class sets have skirts or dresses!
    • The Mogu are NOT related to the Mogwai.
    • Morfeeus, a new goblin NPC added to the start zone, will remind goblins that they do NOT know Kung Fu.
    • Players will face off against the elusive Warriors of Virtue in a new dungeon and learn a lesson about peer-pressure.
    • To foster camaraderie among the Alliance, King Varian will now address all NPCs and players as “bro” regardless of gender.
    • To match the Asian theme and tone of the expansion, item levels will be renamed ‘power level’
    • Complete combat system overhauled designed around card games confirmed. Spells and abilities replaced with trading cards.
    • In order to promote players to get out in the world, Warlock summoning spells will now also kill the caster and clickers
    • Female armor does not contain any chain mail or plate bikinis. All pants are ass-less though.
    • Mists will introduce a new PvE stat “NotSuck” that will boost all damage and healing in Dungeon & Raid Finder groups.
    • In memorial of Theramore, Goth Jaina builds the new Linkon Park.
    • Worgen Druids will receive exclusive out-of-combat ‘Human Form’.
    • Several Lorekeeper NPCs added to world to remind players that monks are not ninjas, and China is not the same as Japan.
    • Demonology Warlocks will be tanks.
    • New Legendary Revealed! First Shield Legendary! In order to make sure it’s rare, it will be +Agility.
    • Hidden across Pandaria are 7 magical orbs that, if gathered, will summon a dragon and grant your class a buff.
    • Pandaren start zone quests include “Wax the Car” and “Paint the Fence”
    • The origins of the Sha revealed! They are what happens when you leave Pandaren ice cream out in the sun too long.
    • Hunters can tame anything for a variable length depending on the level of their new “Training” skill, even players!
    • In a Horde specific scenario, players will face the Horde’s ancient and deadliest foe: BEES. And the Alliance will have a parallel scenario where they face their long time enemy: POOR PEOPLE.
    • Tirion Fordring confirmed as faction leader for the Pandaren.
    • The Argent Crusade will have a presence in Heroic Scholo. They don’t actually do anything, but they are standing there.
    • Along with raising and maintaining a farm, players will also have to defend their land by launching birds at felboars.
    • With Monks now in game, Paladins will be losing their tank and healing specs in favor of new abilities that make sparkles.
    • Warlocks are getting a glyph that gives them a taunt, Mages will be receiving a new healing AND tanking spec.
    • Players will receive a shocking twist at level 90 when a quest line reveals that a pandaren is just 3 gnomes in a suit.

    @San_Lear

    • The expansion ends with a tearful public service announcement from Garrosh on the dangers of steroid abuse.
    • Thrall is forced by Aggra to move into the Cleft of Shadows after being caught trying to “get his Proudmoore on.”
    • “Chow Yun Fat-Free” is a BOE cooking recipe.
    • Everyone is thrown for a loop when the real villain of Pandaria is revealed to be Shepard from Mass Effect 3.
    • The “Harrison Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Item” questline doesn’t go over as well as hoped.
    • Druids are given animal forms of the rest of the classes. The Donkey Death Knight is scrapped as “too depressing.”
    • Accused of Horde bias, the band “Level 90 Elite Tauren Chieftain” renames itself “Level 100 Uber Human Dude.”
    • Battlegrounds get sponsors, such as “Alterac Valley, brought to you by McDonalds.” The winner gets a McSword or McShield.
    • Alementals abilities are datamined. Beer Goggles: +85 inflation to ego. Debuff: Waking up the next morning.
    • Players will discover the hard way that the Pandaren do, in fact, have a Kung Fu grip.
    • Tirion gives one of Arthas’ twins to a moisture farmer to raise in Tanaris.
    • Blizzard begins the “Pandaren, at least they’re not Ewoks” ad campaign.
    • The real reason the Forsaken destroyed Southshore is retconned as the cancellation of the Alliance’s “Jersey Southshore.”

    @Druidis4fite

    • Hidden Continent of Pandaria was under Crusader’s Coliseum all this time.
    • Warlock taunt only works on non-boss level mobs and mages
    • Hidden continent of Panderia was inside you all along
    • Stormwind Library adds several progressive volumes about Orientalism.

    Other Awesome People

    • New Race added. Trolls! no really please will someone play one of these, We’re bored of Blood elves – @DanRyyu
    • Large styled belts are now limited to one per server, players can only challenge for these belts AT WRESTLEMAINA! – @DanRyyu
    • All PvP players who refuse to fight near the objective will be permabanned after three BGs. – @CosmicLaurel
    • Tier 14 Monk Armor revealed to be a yellow tracksuit with black striping. – @WalksTweets
    • Monks surprisingly cannot use the /flirt or /hug commands and cannot enter Goldshire due to vows of chastity.  – @WalksTweets
    • Completing 1000 Pandaren cooking dailies will reward the player with a pair of legendary chopsticks – @RogueDarren
    • Arcane mages get 3rd DPS ability, makes arcane rotation 33% more difficult – @Leodartbok
    • New Death Kinght ability: Furry of Frostmourne – 3 sec cast, turns your enemies into Pandas. – @Leodartbok
    • Aggra is carrying Velen’s love child – @Atanae
    • The Aspects are re-granted their original powers after eating the magical Sensu beans from the Pandaren. – @Katana_Angel
    • Garrosh is discovered to be Thrall’s evil clone, created by the Royal Apothecary Society to destroy the horde from within. – @Katana_Angel
    • Everyone can eat and drink at the same time. If you’re a Pandaren, you can eat, drink, and brew beer at the same time. – @WoWCynwise
    • Just discovered! In MoP, BM Hunters get 2 min CD Bestial Xform – change into a twin of their active pet for 15 secs! – @BigBearButt
    • Pet Battle System only way to earn Trinkets. – @Melofedge
    • Genn Greymane gets rabies, bites and infects Jaina Proudmoore, and then sends players on a poop quest in Lordaeron. – @Druidleaves
    • Pandaran cooking profession now include a recipe for Sweetfire Chicken sponsored by Panda Express, home of the flying wok. – @KneeDough

    ((A huge thank you to all the awesome folks that joined in the fun on twitter.  I love to see what people come up with.  To those who aren’t already, I would highly recommend following all these amazing tweeps.  They are an amazingly fun bunch!))

  • “Garrosh has become corrupted and has been doing some really nasty things beneath Orgrimmar.” – MMO Champion

    “Sha: Lethal dark energy—absorbs hateful emotions and easily corrupts those who are unsuspecting” – WoWHead

    Garrosh has become corrupted – Sha … easily corrupts

    GARROSH CORRUPTED – SHA CORRUPTS

    Gee, can we guess what happens to Garrosh this expac?

  • So the news has just been pouring out about The Old Republic’s new Legacy system, and I must admit as a raging alt-aholic I am very excited.  The idea of being able to unlock new options and abilities by sampling all the game has to offer is an idea I really enjoy.  Kind of like the concept of bonuses carrying over in a New Game+ on other RPGs.

    For those who are unaware of what TOR’s legacy system is all about, it will be my great pleasure to inform you!  Essentially, after you complete Act One of your first character on a server, you get to create a Legacy. At the moment, the system is pretty much just a legacy name that can be displayed as your characters last name “____ Skywalker” or as a title underneath your name “_____ <The Skywalker Legacy>”.  After unlocking your legacy you begin to accrue legacy experience on top of your normal experience gains, and as you progress you gain legacy levels.  It’s very similar to how World of Warcraft’s guild system works after its revision at the beginning of Cataclysm, but instead of unlocking bonuses for the entire guild, you unlock bonuses for all your characters on a single server.

    These unlocks come from a bunch of different things too.  You get an unlock for each companion you max out your affection with and complete all of their conversations, and you get other unlocks based on your alignment (Reaching Dark V, Light V or maintaining a neutral alignment at level 50).  As you gain legacy levels you’ll be able to purchase other upgrades as well, such as having a mailbox or auction house right on your ship.  One of the cooler features is when you get to level 50, you unlock a legacy version of one of that class’ signature abilities (like flamethrower for bounty hunters, or lightning storm for inquisitors), and you also unlock the race you played for any new character – regardless of faction or class!

    I’ll admit that I’m a sucker for “unlocking” things.  I like achievements, I like new abilities, I like unlocking new weapons in Mass Effect, and I like unlocking the little cashbox in my bedroom that has nothing in it but I keep it around because I like unlocking things so much!  So you combine my love of unlocking with my love of alts and I am going crazy! So much so that there was a vocalized noise of pain that would send shivers down the spine of the Man in Black when I heard that the 1.2 patch was going to be in April and not March!  If there was one bad thing I could say for TOR’s new legacy system is that it’s per server and not account wide.  If you’re Legacy level 50 with all the unlocks on one server, and then roll on a new one? You get jack. Nothing. Nada. Not even a last name until you unlock a new legacy for THAT server and start the legacy level grind again.  Oh come on! Really? Is it THAT hard to make the system account-wide?  Just make Legacy names non-unique!  It’s not like everyone with the last name Smith is related!

    Wait… If I recall there was another big MMO that was talking about making a system account-wide.  Oh, of course! Only my biggest and happiest moment of the entire Mists of Pandaria announcement last year:  Account-wide achievements!  As someone who has had three separate achievement hunter toons, the level of giddiness in my voice when they announced that was at least 8.9 Pinky Pie’s (The standard for measuring joy).  But you know what would make account-wide achievements even better?  Well, how about taking a page from TOR and add some fun and interesting unlocks in there as well!

    How about unlocking a signature ability from a class you’ve gotten to max level?  Just on a ridiculous cooldown?  Get a death knight to max level, all characters get access to Army of the Dead.  Warrior? Unlock Heroic Leap.  Hunters?  Um…  well… uh…  Aspect of the Pack?  You get the idea though.  With each class you get to max level, you unlock an achievement that in turn unlocks an ability for all your characters. Just imagine how awesome that would be!  Imagine a warlock turning into a demon and then summoning an army of the dead to assault  a boss.  /drool

    The other idea that comes to mind is the whole unlocking races thing.  At first I thought there would be no way this could ever make it into WoW.  They have such a huge focus on maintaining which races belong to which faction.  But once again I am happy to say that Blizzard has proved me wrong, because along with account-wide achievements, we are getting our first cross-faction race with the pandaren.  So I am perfectly willing and down right gleeful to speculate that unlocking other races is not explicitly being ruled out! That means my dream of a horde gnome might come to fruition! And I know plenty of people who wish the tauren would come to the alliance.  Blizzard could add a new ‘turncoat’ start area for former alliance races defecting to the horde or a ‘refugee camp’ for horde races looking to flee Hellscream’s eyes. If not how about achievements to unlock the race for the few classes that they can’t roll yet? I’d take a gnome paladin too.

    In general, there is real possibility for the account-wide achievements to add new functionality to the game for people much like TOR is adding.  It could even mimic guild bonuses (but not stack with them) in terms of discounts or bonuses.  Maybe even be able to unlock much wanted features like account banks or cross-faction mail for accounts.  There is real potential for both TOR’s legacy system and WoW’s new account-wide achievements.  I can’t wait to see what Blizz and Bioware do with them.

  • You may have noticed that posts around here are few and far between as of late.  This is due to several things.  First and probably most of all is the fact that I’ve been extremely depressed as of late.  Which honestly makes it very hard to write anything.  I struggle to find any motivation to even log in and start on a new post when I get like this.  For that, I’m sorry.  I also sometimes feel bad that I don’t write more about Dungeons & Dragons or cartoons, things I wanted to tackle but can’t figure out a good way to do it.

    Even worse is when the dark thoughts start creeping into my head and make me want to give up this blog entirely.  Why bother? It seems like I’m just talking to myself and the vast majority of my hits are just people coming from Google Images to see the few Adventure Time or Thundercats pictures I have used in previous posts.  That maybe I should have just left this entire thing to collect dust after I left WoW, as I think most just stopped paying attention after that. I try to stay positive and say that just because I don’t get hits or comments, doesn’t mean someone out there isn’t enjoying this.  I’m sure someone is.

    The other reason is mainly because I don’t know what to write about because I’m kind of stuck in gaming limbo at the moment.  No one game has my entire attention right now.  I’ve kind have been bouncing around between playing Mass Effect 3, Skyrim, Deus Ex: Human Revolution,  (Deep breath now…) Fallout New Vegas, SW:TOR AND I’ve begun to once again miss WoW.

    That last one is kind of weird, because there isn’t much that I really enjoyed in Cataclysm.  It’s mostly just that I miss the people there I guess.  I was part of a really amazing guild full of fun people, but the game itself was boring me to tears.  It just wasn’t worth the money to keep playing.  Now with Mists of Pandaria news trickling in, I’ve got the urge to go back and say hello.  It almost feels shameful in some respects because I’m supposed to be a “TOR player” now.

    I have tried to emulate that experience of finding fun people to play with in TOR too. But it’s been… well, a mixed bag.  I seem to play at all the wrong times for the guilds I’ve joined.  By the time I log on, there’s one person other person online.  I do enjoy the actual game though, the story is exactly what I always wanted from my WoW experience.  But I miss the social atmosphere and ease of just hopping in and out of groups from WoW.  Say what you want about the Dungeon Finder, it was a godsend to shy people like me.  And when the topic gets approached on the TOR forums,  someone usually not-so-politely states that if you’re not a social butterfly, you need to GTFO from MMOs.  How kind.

    However, I didn’t leave WoW for TOR because I hated WoW, or think the game is dying or doomed, or have some personal vendetta against Ghostcrawler.  I left it because at the moment, I didn’t have anything to do.  I just wanted to do something different.  Does that somehow place me firmly in the camp of a diehard TOR-ite?  TOR’s great and all, but I would hardly call it perfect.  It is improving and the team working on it seems completely interested in improving that experience for everyone.  When it boils down to it, I really do enjoy both games.  So why do I feel shame about missing WoW sometimes?

    It partially has something to do with how other people view the situation.  I left WoW, started playing SWTOR, and if I go back to WoW, it must be because TOR failed in some way.  Even the slightest hint of talking about coming back to WoW spurs old guildmates’ chuckles about how BAD The Old Republic must be. But it’s not. Each game fulfills a certain need of mine.  I enjoy them both in different ways.  It drives me nuts to hear people talk like that.  It reminds me of the ‘old days’ when – one moment, gotta get my old man hat and rocking chair out…  there we go. – when we used to argue and battle about SEGA vs. Nintendo.  You could only like one.  You had to throw your hat in with one or other.  Which was completely STUPID.  And worse, continues to happen to this day with Sony/Microsoft/Nintendo or MMOs like Rift/TOR/WoW.

    It’s okay to like more than one thing.  It is!  The only really issue for me is time and money. Honestly, I wish there was a way I could squeeze everything I like about both games into one big gooshie lump of a game-y thing-a-majig but I can’t.  So now I find myself in the awkward position of not knowing what to do or what to play.  My TOR subscription is set until July, and I hope to have heard SOME kind of news about the Mists release date by then.  But until then, it’s hard to play anything without getting my innards all in a twist, and when I can’t play – well, I have a bit of a struggling writing about it.

    Ultimately, I wonder if I made a mistake sticking with the word “Odd” in the title.  It originally made sense when I would write lavish posts about things that I found very weird in games.  Like giant skeletons with no explanation, or how a huge dwarven dam looked like it was spitting at you, but now my rambling is less odd and more…  well, I dunno what I can describe my writing as.  I contemplated on Twitter about scrapping it all and starting fresh so I wouldn’t have that name sitting on my head, but at the same time I’ve grown quite attached to it.  I’ve also been trying to push my posts to be more ‘personal’ and worry less about ‘objective content’ or worrying if something is necessarily ‘funny enough’.  I suppose this post would be a good step in that direction but then again I am not sure.

    Anyway, I just wanted to let everyone know exactly what is going on around here.  We’re trying to get everything sorted out and figured out, but as we approach the end of the first year as “The Land of Odd” and my fifth year of writing this blog across all its incarnations, there is a lot on my mind about what to do with it.  I thank you all for your patience and would welcome any and all suggestions or criticisms about this website.  I want to make it awesome and enjoyable for people, and keep it fun to write.  So feedback is – as always – appreciated, and I apologize for all the delays.

  • So with Mass Effect 3 coming out in… *looks at Xbox 360 screen*  T-3 days?  Whatever. Tuesday. I’ve decided to do one last play through of Mass Effect and Mass Effect 2.  I’ve heard through the inter-web-o-sphere grapevine that the Normandy in ME3 will feature a memorial wall for all the people who have died in the trilogy, also the fact that almost everyone you’ve ever teamed up with will be showing up at some point in the game. Well, what happens if those people aren’t there to team up?  Who replaces them?  In every single save game of ME2 I’ve got, I have saved Wrex, I have kept my entire crew alive through the suicide mission, and everything is set for war with the reapers.  But what if you fill up that memorial wall and kill everyone? Well, mostly everyone.  My end goal of this last play through is to leave just enough people alive to ensure that the save imports into Mass Effect 3.  That means killing everyone you can except for 2 crew members.  Easy, right? Wrong.

    Oh sure, in the first Mass Effect it’s really easy.  There’s a maximum of two crew members that can be permanently killed off.  The fun comes in finding ways to kill off NPCs as well.  Captain Kirrahe on Virmire?  Yea. Skip all the side missions, and send more guards his way and you can guarantee that the good captain won’t be able to hold the line. The Council? Oh you betcha. The Rachni? Dead as door nails.  The Zhu’s Hope colonists?  Well, let’s just say my Shepard is the Butcher of Torfan AND Feros now.  It makes things so much easier not bothering to save people.  I actually made it through the game, even with a large chunk of the side quests complete, in record time.

    Mass Effect 2, on the other hand, is where things get tricky. It does still shorten the game to not have to worry about loyalty missions or having a good paragon or renegade score to settle disputes, but the real task is making sure that you kill the most people and still surviving to the end. The general idea is to have all but two crew members die in the final suicide mission.  That means not rescuing the Normandy crew, and killing off the majority of your team mates. However you MUST have at least two team members survive or else Commander Shepard himself will die and you won’t be able to import the game into Mass Effect 3. Considering the nature of the suicide mission, and how many factors and decisions can lead to death or survival, this requires a careful hand and a lot of planning.  I’ve hunted down charts, checklists, and made countless sticky notes to plot the course of who should die and when.  Thankfully, the internet has provided ample resources of how things like not researching improved armor will affect the final mission, including a list of who will die and in what in what priority.  I can only imagine the research that went into figuring out how each of these events can shakedown.

    I haven’t finished the play through yet.  I’m about 3/4ths done at the moment.  But I’ve been getting this weird sort of mix of glee and dread in the fact that I am purposefully doing something so counter intuitive.  This isn’t like the Ironman Challenge where it’s about restricting yourself to increase the challenge.  At least, not that I am aware of yet. That opinion may change once ME3 comes out and I see the results of all of this.  But to actively plot the demise of your own team and to be crossing your fingers to hope that they all perish in the flames of battle is something you don’t do in video games too often.  I know I’m crazy, but there’s crazy and then there’s crazy.  You know what I mean?

    So have you ever worked to do something in a game that is the complete antithesis of what you should be doing?

  • || SITH INQUISITOR || Chapter One –>

    Warning: This post contains spoilers for the prologue of the Sith Inquisitor storyline in Star Wars: The Old Republic.  To see a spoiler-free summary of the storyline please check this page instead.

    Welcome to my new series, where I look back, review, discuss, joke about and rip apart the different class story lines in the Old Republic.  For the WoW readers who haven’t messed around with TOR, allow me to explain.  Throughout the leveling game in TOR, you have several types of stories.  There are one shot mission stories, overall stories for each world you visit and there are your class storylines.  The first two are things that everyone does.  They have a little extra flair here and there that are tossed in for your class. Usually in the way of some changed lines of dialogue or unique choices on the dialogue wheel.  The latter on the other hand is the exclusive storyline of your class only.  It’s what makes playing the game 8 different times worth while.  Now which class stories shine and which crash and burn?  Well that’s what this here series is about.  I’m going to go through each class as I level them, break down the stories of the prologue and three acts, and then write about what I think their strengths and weaknesses are.  I hope you enjoy!

    First up is the inquisitor. The Sith inquisitor was one of the first classes I really latched on to as a concept.  For me it wasn’t necessarily the ability to shoot lightning as much as it was the idea of a secretive, scheming Sith who liked to play chess master all over the galaxy.  Yes, I dreamed of manipulating my foes, setting traps, and executing masterful Xanatos and Batman gambits.  What I did not dream of was blindly stumbling into my station in life while working for someone who does all that.  /sigh.  Welcome to the world of the Sith inquisitor.

    Korriban

    After your opening crawl, you will find yourself on the ancestral territory of the Sith, Korriban.  Where you are quickly brought in and abused by your overseer.  You are a slave, and not exactly well-respected by the Empire, and doubly so if you are any race other than human or a Sith pureblood. Actually, I’ve played through this entire world a few times. All as different races.  The interesting thing I noticed is the number of conversations on Korriban and to a lesser extent Dromund Kaas that actually change depending on if you are an alien or not.  Oh, you’re treated like dirt no matter what.  Even if you are a distinguished Sith pureblood, which are normally held up as measuring stick to all others.  I’ve often wondered exactly how a Sith pureblood would end up in slavery.  My first inquisitor I had constructed a lavish back story that mirrored the Count of Monte Christo.  A betrayed pureblood was exiled and captured by slavers after being framed by a rival.  Seemed plausible enough.

    The general storyline of Korriban is that you and a bunch of other slaves are being tossed into the Sith academy in an attempt to weed out one individual to become the new apprentice of Lord Zash.  You’re put through trials by Overseer Harkun, who seems to be passionately rooting for a Sith pureblood named Pfon to win the prize.  It’s been commented a dozen times across the web that there may be something to Harkun’s almost idolatrous fawning over Pfon.  Some have read potential sexual undertones to the whole thing.  I honestly just saw as a fanatic worship of the pure blood, something the Sith seem to have going for them. At least on Korriban. (This theory is extremely weird and hard to believe if you are leveling a Sith pureblood however. Might just wanna go with the sexual idea. Why not?) I haven’t seen it turn up much anywhere else so far.  Needless to say, Harkun is quick to praise this ‘rival’ and punish you.  He will routinely assign Pfon easy assignments and send you into death traps, and when you succeed he accuses you of cheating.  The general idea, as explained by the crazy old Sith in the tombs during your first mission, is for you to hate Harkun and Pfon.  In this regard, it absolutely succeeded.

    During your various trials, you eventually are met by a blonde woman in Sith robes.  This is the mysterious Lord Zash.  Which your character – who has never met or seen an image of Zash at this point – immediately recognizes.  The only reason I knew this was because I happened to have the subtitles on during this scene.  I can’t tell if I – the player – was supposed to know who this was.  If I was, it’s really poorly established.  She never says her name. In fact, I doubt I would have caught it without subtitles until the next conversation with Harkun when one of the dialogue options is to mention that you were chatting with your ‘future master’.  Honestly, out of everything, this is probably the biggest problem with the entire Korriban segment of the storyline.  Why doesn’t she just introduce herself? It would be simple! “I am Lord Zash.” There. Done. Ambiguity removed. WHY IS THIS HARD?

    The conclusion of your trials have you freeing a creature known as a Dashade and retrieving a star map.  You are able to triumph over Pfon, who had a head start, by Lord Zash appearing and revealing the secret to freeing the monster after he had left. Finally, a lucky break for your beaten down… uh… hero?  You go into the tomb and free the creature, who calls himself Khem Val.  He was a servant of Tulak Hord.  Which begs the question of why Tulak Hord sealed him away in the Tomb of Naga Sadow.  I honestly haven’t the clue. It gave me pause originally, but in all likeliness it has more to do with the fact that once you go back a few thousand years in Star Wars history, I stop giving a damn.  Of course, if Khem was IN the tomb of Tulak Hord, he probably would realize that his former master was dead, instead of sitting there waiting for him to return.

    The story on Korriban wraps up with you returning with the star map that Zash wanted and the Dashade following your command, as Harkun tries to pull the fast one on Lord Zash and attempts to convince her that Pfon obtained the map instead.  In a move that royally ticked me off, Zash kills Pfon.  Really?  You couldn’t give me that? After dealing with that annoying punk for 10 levels, I have to sit there and watch my new master kill my rival?  Oh whatever. If anything it gives me a reason to hate the eerily nice and cheerful Zash even more.  Your new master invites you up to her office, where she tells you to meet her on Dromund Kaas, hands you her old lightsaber, and you are quickly introduced via henchmen to a new rival – Darth Skotia.  Have fun pronouncing that one. It’s pronounced no less than two completely different ways during the next 10 levels.  Also, she just hands you a lightsaber.  That’s it.  Nothing else.  There’s no fanfare or celebration.  I know this doesn’t seem like a big thing, but that’s because this is the first one of these posts.  I’ve played every force class to the point where they receive their saber, and they always have a nice dramatic cinematic for it.  The Jedi use the force to assemble theirs, and the Sith warrior breaks open an ancient tomb and claims one from a dead Sith lord before battling a half dozen mummies.  But the inquisitor?  You get one handed to you.  Zash keeps it in a drawer of her desk.  I suppose there’s some sentimental value because it was HER old lightsaber.  But really?  That’s IT?  C’mon!

    Dromund Kaas

    When you first arrive at the homeworld of the Empire, you immediately are greeted by the very Darth Skotia you had just heard about.  He is a giant, mostly robot, Sith lord who gets a nice reverb to his voice that makes my cyborg characters insanely jealous.  He drops a warning to you that he ‘knows what Zash is up to’, which is either foreshadowing of what is to come in act one, or old news if you are a paranoid sort who doesn’t trust Zash from the moment she called you over in Harkun’s office.  You then go to meet up with your master and deliver Skotia’s vague threats.  Zash immediately lets you in on the plan.  Or part of it, at least.  Zash needs a secret relic for her ritual and a fancy new office, so you’re going to kill Darth Megatron. Oh. Okay. Well, that was blunt.

    The plan to destroy the Darth is two-fold.  First you are sent to find an ancient tablet that will force his trandoshan bodyguards to stand down or obey.  This is, of course, kept in a super secure secret facility under a mountain.  It’s actually a relatively simple smash-and-grab operation, only really spruced up by the side missions you get while you are the giant mountain being carved into a statue.  However this tablet will really prove to be more fun later.  The second half of the plan is to find a scientist that is being imprisoned by the rogue Sith lord Gratham.  The scientist has developed a tool that will severely damage Darth Skotia’s mechanical parts.  Naturally, the scientist doesn’t have it on him, so you have to go down into the lab to get it.  Again, other than the choice of what to do with the scientist, this is just another smash and grab job.  There’s not a ton of suspense, just you playing fetcher monkey to Zash.  This actually sets a good tone because that last sentence can be used to describe about 90% of the next act of the Sith inquisitor’s story.  Not that it’s dull. There’s fun to be had in the process.  At least you can actually mouth off to Zash about being her gopher.  I appreciated that.

    After you’ve retrieved the doo-hickey and the thinga-ma-bob, it is time to face off against the Darth and get the boss a promotion! Zash, being smart enough to establish an alibi, goes off to a party with some other Darths and Lords in town while you meander down the hall to find Darth Mega Man.  You first get to take control of his body guards with the tablet you retrieved earlier.  The choice is ordering them to stand down and leave or tell them to kill Skotia.  I always chose the latter, not because Skotia has any sort of affection for them but because I like the idea of him destroying his own defenses.  I’d like to think he’d learn a lesson before I kill him but I know he doesn’t.  Then as soon as the fight has begun, you ‘taze him bro’ with the thing you got from the scientist and then just wail away on him.  Despite being a boss level mob, he goes down pretty easy after you zap him.  Now that Darth Robocop is dead, you can join Zash at the party to celebrate (or more so give Zash a reason to leave the party as she seems bored out of her mind).

    It’s at this point you are introduced to Darth Thanaton who has a brief and angry exchange with Zash.  In a great deal of foreshadowing, Thanaton will not be relevant to you in any way until you’re in the 30’s.  I really liked the fact that you get a few good looks at him early on, and establish that he doesn’t much care for Zash or her plans.  You rendezvous back with Zash at her new and roomier office to find that she’s been promoted to a Darth! Nice!  What do you get? A mission befitting Mystery Inc! Yay?  Zash wants you to go the Dark Temple (Okay, we really need these to have better names.  How many Dark Temples have I been to in my 20+ years of video games?) and pacify a ghost that is haunting the tomb with yet another relic she needs for the ritual.

    Finally, you get an interesting twist during one of your tasks and discover that you do not actually need to fight the ghost.  Because you get to have your own Skywalker moment when the ghost appears and explains that you are his great, great, great, great, great, great-grandchild.  He calls himself Lord Kallig, a rival of Tulak Hord (and a part of me always laughs at Khem Val when he mentions it), and he has come from the beyond to assist you in reclaiming your family’s once proud position.  And oh boy are you going to need it.  He also informs you that Zash seeks to betray you!  Which isn’t exactly shocking, because both Skotia and the in-game codex have pretty much already told you that.  Of course, you can happily choose to deny it.  After all, Zash has been pretty cool to you since you became her apprentice, and this ghost just claims to be your grandpa and now you have to trust him?  Riiiight.

    Dromund Kaas wraps up with the Ghost of Kallig’s warning, returning the relic from the tomb, and Zash giving you a new ship and some orders.  The star map you retrieved from your last trial on Korriban has helped Zash track down the location of two more relics on Balmorra and Nar Shadaa.  Which fortunately happen to be the next worlds you are within the level range to do! Pure coincidence, I am sure.  And of you go on your amazing new giant, TIE fighter looking thing! For adventure!

    My Thoughts

    Despite my constant joking, the Sith inquisitor prologue does an amazingly good job of setting up the status quo for the class.  You are introduced to several key characters, are given a solid purpose from both Zash – who explains that she has had visions of you becoming all-powerful through this mysterious ritual – and Kallig – who wants to see his family line restored to their rightful place.  The idea of rituals is an important one and is established prominently from the get go with the gathering of relics and items to reinforce your power, including freeing Khem Val who becomes your first companion and bound servant.

    Zash is not nearly the mustache-twirler my humorous retelling would paint her to be.  She is actually very good about establishing a solid level of trust with you early on.  Unlike Harkun or Skotia, who treat you as some lesser being because you were a slave (even more so if you were an alien slave), Zash is kind and encouraging.  The first time you meet her she calls you a slave and then quickly corrects herself by referring to you as an acolyte instead.  She congratulates and compliments you on your victories, were as Harkun was quick to accuse you of cheating.  She honestly seems to be the only person you ever meet that appreciates you.  If I didn’t know what was to come, I’d write off Skotia’s warnings as sheer jealousy.  The story does a great job of actually making you like working under Zash.

    That being said, there is a good amount of just being a gopher.  You don’t exactly feel very important in the grand scheme of things quite yet.  There are a few attempts to create a sort of “chosen one” mentality with things like shooting lightning at a holocron to get it to open which you’re told is something no one has done in thousands of years apparently.  It’s fine though, a lot of class stories feel that way in the prologues. It is after all, a prologue. My real frustrations with the Inquisitor’s story don’t start to further down the line.

    Anyway, that’s my first entry in what I hope to be a nice full series.  As always, feedback is appreciated and feel free to leave your own opinions on the story in the comments.  I would love to hear them!  Hope you enjoy my thoughts and retrospectives on the stories of SWTOR.

    || SITH INQUISITOR || Chapter One –>

  • Kripparrian, the Immortal Ironman. Err… Irontroll?

    Well, back when we did the original Ironman Challenge, I gave a huge shout out to Ironmary for being the first person to make it to 85 and conquer the challenge.  Well, since then we have got a new variation, which some have decided to call the ‘Hardcore Ironman’ or the ‘New Ironman Challenge’ or a couple different names – but I have decided to call it the ‘Immortal Ironman Challenge’.  Not dying is a heavy duty task to tack on top of an already difficult challenge.  A name like Immortal is deserving of one who can pull this off.

    Thus it gives me great pleasure to announce that we do have our first Immortal Ironman Challenge victor: Kripparrian the Troll Hunter from Turalyon-US.  You can find more info and Kripparrian’s video here.

    Congratulations! You are an Immortal Ironman! Eat, drink and revel in your victory! You have earned it.  If anyone sees Kripparrian in game, give him a /cheer!

    (Thanks for MMO Melting Pot for finding this and sending it out on Twitter)

  • Can You Even Talk about Blood Elves without posting a picture of Fabulor?

    If there was anything that I could honestly say that Cataclysm did that I loved, it was advance the storyline for the entire world.  Well, the old world at least.  There’s still some timey wimey whatever stuff going on in Outland and Northrend – but this isn’t about that.  No, this post is about the blood elves.  More importantly the complete and utter lack of story involving them in Cataclysm.  The same could be said for the draenei, but I don’t know nearly enough about them. So I’ll leave that to other bloggers.

    But there was a huge missed opportunity for the sin’dorei in my eyes.  They could have become a major player in the new Horde.  Especially with the Forsaken now dead set on conquest of the Eastern Kingdoms, it will only be a matter of time before they have to cross blades with the Argent Crusade who have firmly rooted themselves in the Plaguelands, and with an army backed by a new font of holy power lying just to the north, one has to wonder if Lady Sylvanas would reach out to old friends in order to complete her mission to claim all of Lordaeron for the Forsaken.

    But that didn’t happen.  In fact, despite the successful reclamation of the Ghostlands by a unified force of Forsaken and Blood Elves, there is little to no mention of their ‘friends to the north’.  Perhaps they fear the Sunwell’s possible effects on the undead?  Or maybe there is underlying mistrust after the betrayal of Prince Kael’thas?  Who knows.  The real question for me is more so, if the timeline for WoW has indeed move forward…  what exactly is going on beyond the forests of Quel’thalas?

    What We Have Here is a Failure to Conspire

    The question is really based on a small insignificant piece of dialogue from Wrath of the Lich King, where there were hints of a frustration in the ranks of Blood Elf society.  Despite Regent Lord Lor’themar’s decision to stand with their new found allies in the Horde then with the corrupted Kael’thas and his fel-tainted elves during the battle for the Sunwell, Ranger General Halduron Brightwing urges Horde players to not get involved with Lor’themar’s political scheming with the Grand Magister Rommath during the quest to reforge the ancient blade Quel’delar.

    Political scheming? What’s this?  Is there something going on here?  Not entirely surprising since much of blood elven culture has been one of duality.  There is the seen – a simple tailoring shop – and the unseen – that uses demons and slave labor.  Even the guards seem to be on duty to prevent anyone from seeing the tears in the seems of the blood elf society.  The protesters in the Bazaar are quickly silenced and brain washed into behaving, the constructs patrolling the city shout off things like “happiness is mandatory”, and I will remind you that these were all occurred after Lor’themar assumed the role of leader.

    Could it be possible that the blood elves are trying to reclaim their former glory through dystopia?   Praise the glory of the sin’dorei or be silenced forever?  It would go a long way to explain why Halduron would go the distance to make contact with the high elves during the crisis in Zul’Aman (much to Lor’themar’s dissaproval) instead of seeking reinforcements from Silvermoon.  If the man in charge of Quel’thalas’ defense is becoming distrustful of Silvermoon’s leadership, then I think we may all have cause for worry.

    The Sunwell: Best way to roast marshmallows EVER!

    The Eternal Sun Shall Guide Us

    And there in lies a great opportunity to advance the story of the sin’dorei!  The fact that the leadership is scheming, inept, and resort to such drastic measures as brainwashing problematic citizens could indeed be reason enough for a revolution in the ranks.  But who would rise up against Lor’themar?  The Farstriders?  They are now too few, and stretched too thin to be of any use.  It would take a powerful force to rise up and seize the reins of Silvermoon.  Someone who commands loyalty from their soldiers, is respected amongst a number of species, who has battled their demons and come out with a new found respect for the Light and what it means to uphold its ways.

    Oh for Brann’s sake, I’m talking about Lady Liadrin!  Being the leader of the Blood Knights, she commands a large and powerful force that is now rekindled by the rebirth of the Sunwell.  She is on a mission to the see the blood elves returned to their former glory, and she is a reformed follower of the Holy Light.  I could easily see her leading her paladins to usurp the Regent-Lord and uniting the blood elves under her.

    After all, if the blood elves quench their thirst now through the holy energies of the Sunwell, a Light-centric society would make sense. It would also introduce an interesting concept of a theocratic government, which really hasn’t been touched on before in Warcraft. The only possible exception being possibly the draenei since their spiritual leader is also their faction leader and their society has a strong affinity for the Light, but can you really say the draenei have a form of government? I always say them as refuges, not an entire civilization.  Either way, a Light based theocratic blood elf government would be a fascinating angle to explore.  It would also bolster the story of the Reliquary who are searching for ancient arcane artifacts for more power.  Why are the Reliquary bothering with this if the Sunwell now provides what they’ve needed since the Burning Crusade?  If they had rejected the Holy Light and decided to seek out purely arcane means to cure their cravings and redeem their society, well that’s suddenly a much more interesting reason.

    It would also go a long way to explaining why the Forsaken would not want to get involved with the blood elves.  After all, the energies of the Holy Light are fairly painful to the undead, and their reverence for the Forgotten Shadow would put them at odds with their former allies, and would further drive the Forsaken into more isolationist tendencies of wanting to rely on their own instead of the orcs, blood elves or even the Horde in general.

    I really think it would be an engaging and fascinating change up for the blood elves in Cataclysm.  Instead we got warrior trainers and Lor’themar got a few new lines.  Wonderful.  Fabulous. Great.  What wasted potential.  Well, maybe the next expansion will do SOMETHING with them?